pucha's guide to happines

i should be smiling my gums out until they dry. it would be hard to close my mouth when that happens. i mean, pare, what would it take to make a pucha happy? huh? let me count the ways.

a pucha can be happy when he can:
1) should be able to curse anytime, anywhere on the top of his lungs. remember, a pucha is a smoker. nay. a marlboro red smoker. take your lungs out. place on some cushy surface. step on top of it. now swear like you had no lungs. remember. you are on top of it.

2) should be able to check out them mares (female horses. the pucha is a male horse. and should be big like a horse. loves red horse. red bull. and anything in between).

3) drink like there's no tomorrow. a pucha is essentially an essentialist. a pucha loves essence. like the essence of chicken. the essence of perfume. the essence of alcohol no matter what form. anything that has essence. like whispering to a horse. whispering until he is hoarse. a pucha is always haorse, since he loves to shout on top of his lungs. there is no tomorrow. there is only the essence of tomorrow. thus, a pucha, when he drinks, doesn't think of tomorrow. only the essence of tomorrow. thus, he gets drunk in the essence of tomorrow, today.

4) a pucha should shit his spirit free. breathing in the essence of the four winds. it spirals down the innards of a pucha. the spirit cannot go out of the horse like vegetable-oirgan of a pucha. only life essence is allowed to flowe out of there. yeah. like water. like water for chocolate. like chocolate to suppress primal urges. or just maybe climb up a tree and wail like a cat in heat. kasi nga mataas ang araw. kahit ikaw magrereklamo. back to the spirit. the spirit should be shit free. kung hindi, your burp will smell like shit.

five. six. seven. eight. nine.

capische! (feeling french ako ngayon. like, would you like to french kiss my armpits?)